They say the teacher lets them.
You’ve asked for something and a student tells you the rule is different. Phones out, seats anywhere, music on. It may be completely true, and you have no way to check.
Don’t try to settle whether it’s true. You can’t. Say what happens for this period, say it once, and go back to the task. The longer you negotiate, the more the room learns that rules are negotiable with you.
Why this happens
Two different things look identical from the front of the room. Some of these claims are accurate — teachers run their rooms differently and students are describing their real norms. Others are a test of whether you’ll accept something you can’t verify. You can’t tell them apart in the moment, and trying to is the trap. The move that works treats both the same way: you’re not the authority on what usually happens here, you’re the authority on the next forty minutes. That’s honest with the students, defensible to the teacher, and it’s the only ground you actually hold.
What to do
- Believe them out loud. “You probably do.” Skipping this turns it into a fight about their honesty.
- Separate the usual from today. “I wasn’t left a note about it, so today we’re doing it this way.”
- Rule once, in one sentence, then go straight back to the task. Waiting for agreement invites a second round.
- If it comes back, repeat the same sentence in the same tone. Verbatim repetition ends it faster than new reasoning does.
- Put it in the note, so the teacher can set the record straight next time.
Say this
K–2
“Maybe you do! Today we’re doing it this way.” Then redirect to the activity by name. At this age the claim usually isn’t strategic and doesn’t need to be treated as though it is.
3–8
“You might be right. I wasn’t told, so today we’ll do it my way, and I’ll leave your teacher a note about it.” Then stop talking. Silence closes it. Another sentence reopens it.
9–12
“That’s probably true, and I have no way to check it. For this period, here’s what we’re doing.” Older students respond better to honesty about your limits than to invented authority.
Where the line is
- Yours: what happens during your period, inside the building’s rules.
- The office’s: phones, leaving the building, anything school-wide, if there’s a real dispute.
- The teacher’s: what the norm actually is. You’re not overturning it and you’re not confirming it.
Whatever the building’s policy says, goes. That’s the one thing that outranks both you and the student.
If that doesn’t work
If a whole class insists in unison, treat it as information rather than a united front — it’s often just true. And if the claim is low-stakes and doesn’t break a building rule, you’re allowed to say yes. Save the firm no for safety, leaving the room, or anything the office would care about.
In the note
Students said they usually [X]. I said not today since I didn’t have a note. Happy to run it your way next time. Just let me know.
From Holding the room in The Sub’s Handbook.
Written by a substitute teacher, for substitute teachers. This is what’s worked in real classrooms — not official guidance, and not a substitute for your school’s policies or your district’s training. When something feels beyond you, it probably is: call the office. They’d rather hear from you early than late.
Open subin, the app the handbook comes from. Free to use.
Dan McSpirit is an active guest teacher and the author of The Sub’s Handbook. He built subin for the job he was doing at the time. More of his work is at danmcspirit.com.